Stagnant thoughts;Hello November

I always hated November

By, Lakira MItchum

A time of Stupidity and Loneliness

Wrapping my hands  around my worried thoughts of my female ego, sinking into some form of dysphoria, I’m choking in my thoughts, my once christian desire to hold on to a fictional level of faith.My life, seems disgraceful in my eyes,I feel so trapped lacking in a motivational source of hope, but I made my choice.I seem uncivilized in my decision making ,I hate being the ill-fated  damsel the unlucky protagonists of my own life.With all of these thoughts locked up in a bloody cage of rage like a monster waiting to devour my very being I wait, here only hearing the voice of God. (Faith) and promises, Faith ,Foi. You know that feeling you have when you know no one cares, that’s the American spirit but, what  it’s just a matter of time until something gets better for you or me.I always hated November sense the last time my parents forgot about my birthday, sense the last year I was hated by a christian peer. Sahaim is here; they say, is the time to celebrate the fall  season and the Gods the will come together and bless the universe to go on  into the new season of Yule.Which reminds me  of how terrifying and tedious time is, it  is so funny that  we try to believe time has a tempo one minute its slow and another year latter its  going by too fast we can not truly measure or predict time. I hold my mistakes like a, abortion patient holding their unborn child, With this awkward sickening feeling I might fall off the wagon and forget about my dreams, but something will give me hope, like a mother that kisses an unexpected babe, I may find a reason to love November After all, with the push and pull of my emotions leaving me leaking feeble words in a word press like a babbling fool, I feel eager to know what the next year has to bring.

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